Brain on a chip

The nefarious high priests of the Great Temple of the Evil Robot, seem to ceaselessly worship at the feat of their craven idol. It seems the merry pranksters at Ecole Polytechnique F

It's time to get in shape for the coming endurance derby vs. the Evil Robot Army

You know what was so cute about Robbie The Robot?

The poor woman in this photo...lost that leg before Robbie could be neutralized...The poor woman in this photo...lost that leg before Robbie could be neutralized...


There is nothing cute about Evil Robots!

But, Robbie did have a very noticeable flaw in his otherwise cruelly efficient design. Though he was armed with an extremely dangerous arcing electrical weapon, he also had a tottering and uneven gait. This was crucial in the narrow escapes of young Will Robinson and so many other near victims.

The day is coming however, citizen, where only the fittest shall survive. In this horrific missive from the dangerous robot obsessives of Toyota Corporation, we see a not too distant future where robots will be far more fleet of foot than all but the most agile homo sapiens sapiens. It will be akin to having a demented and blood thirsty Carl Lewis nipping at your very heels!

"We all know of Honda

Games that design themselves

The Unholy Trinity, as it were, of the rise of a dastardly machine dystopia are, essentially, these:

  • A highly functional and robust mechanical system, such that it could crush human bones like so many clusters of grapes, for instance
  • A deviously ornate and subtly nefarious Artificial Intelligence programming or "brains", if you will, such as might be possessed by Gary Kasparov after a week long turpentine bender
  • A corrupt priesthood of deeply deluded man and maid-servants willing to use their dark and sorcerous powers to midwife these abominable dark lords into being, like the species-betraying fellows in the following, bone-chilling, tale

  • GarageGames was founded by four industry veterans in 2001 with the goal of disrupting the games industry with quality development tools and

Robot invented to "crawl through veins"

Well, in exploring this especially low hanging fruit we've discovered that Israel is willing to be sure that they will not be "out-creepied" by DARPA and that they are also world leaders in Evil Robot Science in their own damn right.

With a diameter of just one millimeter, a tiny robot has been unveiled that will crawl through the body to diagnose artery blockage

Scientists from Israel's Technion University have unveiled a tiny robot, made using Micro-Electro-Mechanical Systems (MEMS) technology, purportedly able to crawl through a person's veins in order to diagnose and potentially treat artery blockage and cancer.

The little robot - with a diameter of just one millimeter - has neither engine nor on-board controls, instead being propelled forward by a magnetic field wielded on it from outside the patient's body.

What is it with DARPA & the birds man?

Hitchcock's frozen dismembered head down in the bunker? You doubt it? Your naivety  sickens me!Hitchcock's frozen dismembered head down in the bunker? You doubt it? Your naivety sickens me!

Another entry in the "Evil Avian Robot" chronologue. Humming Birds, an age old symbol of innocence and whimsy, being darkly mirrored and roughly inverted and by our own tax dollars no less. In the continuing effort to leave no slime-slick stone unturned in the effort to remake the wonders of nature into ever more myriad bad-bots; check out this saucy little number. For a color? I'd say pink; like the flesh it will, undoubtedly, one day rend.

"Military-backed researchers have built a tiny drone that looks and flies like a hummingbird, flapping its little robotic wings to stay in the air. So far, the mock bird, built for Pentagon mad-science division Darpa, has only stayed aloft for 20 seconds at a time. But that short flight was enough to show the potential of a whole new class of miniature spies, inspired by nature. Darpa just handed AeroVironment, makers of the winged

All creatures, great and small

In the heavyweight, no-holds-barred, Ultimate Fighting Championship brawl to birth the forerunners of the Evil Robot, you've got to get up pretty early in the morning to beat our friends at DARPA. It could be said that the Evil Robot's most bosom companions are these dark clergy of research and development.

"MONROVIA, Calif.--(BUSINESS WIRE)--AeroVironment, Inc. (AV) (NASDAQ:AVAV) was awarded a Phase II contract extension in April from the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency (DARPA) to design and build a flying prototype for the Nano Air Vehicle (NAV) program. As part of this program AV has accomplished a technical milestone never before achieved: the controlled hovering flight of an air vehicle system with two flapping wings that carries its own energy source and uses only the flapping wings for propulsion and control.

AV achieved the milestone in December 2008 with the successful 20-second flight of the 'Mercury' interim test vehicle. The nano aircraft is capable of climbing and descending vertically, flying sideways left and right, as well as forward and backward, under remote control.

You thought binary A.I. was bad, meet "Brain of Skynet" v.01

...wait until the worker bees of Skynet sort out the details on this one. Whereas your average malevolent machine would simply have mown you down with it's giant, prosthetic. hip-mounted minigun. We can now forsee a new, halcyon day for the mecha-behemoths under whose tank treads the skulls of our children will one day burst, crisply, like so many dessicated cicada husks.

Once the myopic lackeys of the forthcoming army of geared tyrants perfect the Quantum Processor, not only will your warm, palpitating, meat sheath be blown apart, but these ferrous nightmares will have the brains to be deftly hand loading their own ammo with, of course, your name lithely scripted in cursive on each shell.

"A team led by Yale University researchers has created the first rudimentary solid-state quantum processor, taking another step toward the ultimate dream of building a quantum computer."


Full Story at Science Daily

Quoth The Raven, "Target Located, Sector 42"...

Flies, bats, birds, there is no boundary on the pitiable need of the powers that be to pervert the forms of all manner of creatures. Evil Robots are becoming more and more able to peep into your windows and dissolve the Fourth Amendment right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures. Yeah, remember that one?

Evil Robot Bird? Uh, yeah, we would roundly define that as "unreasonable"...

"Unmanned aircraft maker AeroVironment got an additional $5.4 million to further develop the diminutive aircraft that can fly into tight spaces undetected, perch and send live surveillance information to its handlers.

Last Fall, AeroVironment, got $4.6 million initial funding from the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency (DARPA) to develop the Stealthy, Persistent, Perch and Stare Air Vehicle System (SP2S), which is being built on the company's one-pound, 29-inch wingspan battery-powered Wasp unmanned system."

Dirty BirdDirty Bird

Full Story at Network World

Not So Evil Robot News

As the dark, acid tinged, clouds of our comeuppance gather and the clink and whir of demonstratively evil engineering sows the seeds of our darkest doom, behold! What unseasonable joy is this? Candy!

Check out this wondrous device, The CandyFab 6000 from our decidedly less evil friends at Evil Mad Scientist Laboratories (I know! Ironic, ain't it?). Though this fabulous breakthrough is but a small bulwark against the greater evil all about you dear reader, it's kind of nice to stop and smell the rosewater confections.


Do not let down your guard! There will surely be much false flag candy making to lull you into a false sense of security in the coming years of despair. Remember, first and foremost, robots are evil. Evil I tell you! Luckily this is only the "beta" version...

Candy Fab - 6000 (beta)Candy Fab - 6000 (beta)

Full Story at Evil Mad Scientist Laboratories


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